RAW Review: 1st February

Hello! FINALLY! I'VE COME BACK. TO SOCCERBALLANDWRASSSSSSLIN. I realise that's a week too late, but it still works. It's definitely been an interesting week and a bit since my Royal Rumble Predictions, and crucially most of it's been really good stuff when it comes to the WWE on the first parts of the Road to Wrestlemania. I can't say this with 100% certainty, but I'd like to think these Reviews are going to be fully back now. It's been a bad couple of months for me, but I'm definitely having more good days than bad again- and frankly I'm worried about you lot having withdrawal symptoms.

I'm annoyed I didn't get to Review last weeks RAW, because it was fucking amazing. Instead, I've come back to Review one of the most schizophrenic RAW's arguably ever. There was some stuff I absolutely loved on this show, and then also some stuff where I just completely zoned out. Anyway, let's get Reviewin'.

Brock Lesnar, Paul Heyman & Dean Ambrose Promo 
This was great. I don't know if my standards for Opening Segments have dropped ridiculously low at this point after the last two and a half years of The Authority- but I've really liked the last few we had. Paul Heyman is, well Paul Heyman. I genuinely think Heyman could cut a Promo on anything and anyone and it would get over. I'll talk about someone else later in that regard as well, but Heyman is just a once in a lifetime person. The only thing I want the WWE to do now, is to have Brock & Heyman be on the opposite side to as many people as possible. We had Ambrose last night, and he definitely upped his game. I really blow hot and cold with Ambrose, especially when it comes to some of the shit he does in-ring. However, nobody could have been cold on Ambrose after his Promo segment. I've seen some people say how Ambrose doing the Promo instead of Roman is a good sign for Fast Lane. THAT'S WHAT THEY WANT YOU TO THINK. Y'ALL A BUNCH OF PUPPETS. If you even have a fleeting idea that Ambrose could win at Fast Lane, the WWE has done their job for this build- but it's simply not going to happen.

Kalisto v Rusev
In my Royal Rumble Predictions I said provided Kalisto won at the Rumble his first Title win made sense. This was because Kalisto's Title win then couldn't be written off as a "fluke". What do you know, they were putting that over on Commentary. I honestly won't be surprised if Kalisto ends up losing the Title again Fast Lane, if as there's been some speculation about they're angling for a "Mask Match" at Mania between the two. It makes more sense for Del Rio to have the Title for that potential match.

I actually liked this match quite a lot. It was US v TV Champion, and as such both had to be quite protected. They pretty much did as good a job as possible with the match. They managed to put Kalisto's "underdog" gimmick over, while giving him a win as well as protecting Rusev.

Roman Reigns, Dean Ambrose & Stephanie McMahon Backstage Promo
This was fine for what it was. Treating this as a two part segment, with the second being the Brock/Triple H one- it made sense for Stephanie to do this half. It was all pretty standard stuff, but Stephanie trying to drive a wedge between Ambrose and Reigns was a nice touch. BECAUSE AMBROSE IS FUCKING TURNING.

Brie Bella Backstage Promo
Brie Bella's whole gimmick is "Someone related to me fucked their Neck up". This time next year it'll be that JJ bloke from Total Divas in a Neck Brace.

The Grammy Award Winning Usos v Adam Rose & Curtis Axel
There's been a ridiculous number of "Announcer Botches" over the years. Lillian Garcia calling The Usos Grammy Award Winners might have been my favourite. Not just for the botch, however hilarious that was in its own right. THEY FUCKING SHAMED LILLIAN FOR IT ON LIVE TV! It wasn't some loud words in a headset to Lillian. THEY REPEATEDLY SHOWED IT, AND THEN BROUGHT IT UP ON COMMENTARY MULTIPLE TIMES. I did end up feeling a bit bad for Lillian, but I was also laughing hysterically while doing so.

I honestly don't know anything that happened in the match because I was laughing too much. What I will say is I loved the finish, for the sole reason that it looked like Axel was actually going for something when jumped off the Top Rope and took a Superkick.

MizTV w/ AJ Styles
THIS SEGMENT WAS ABSOLUTELY AMAZING. I love AJ Styles, and this is my first Review since AJ's debut. I've been watching AJ Styles for absolutely ages, and he's without a doubt one of- if not the best Wrestler in the World at present. To say AJ needs to work on his Mic skills is an understatement. Dixie is nowhere near as compelling a character as Vince, but I put a lot of TNA's failure at doing the "Summer of Punk" angle at AJ's door because of his Mic work.

The Miz on the other hand is just so fucking amazing when it comes to Promos, and the fact he's not spoken of as one of the best on the Mic regularly is a crime. So what do they do last night? They have The Miz pretty much tell AJ's full story to the "casual" crowd, and fucking hell were the crowd last night "casual". So, this segment, pretty much told us AJ's entire history, while putting heat on The Miz- so when AJ did eventually lay into him the crowd loved it. This segment was just complete genius, and I won't hear a bad word against it.

Brie Bella v Charlotte
This segment was when it all started to go massively downhill. I wish Nikki Bella the best, I genuinely do. However, the fact it appears Brie might end up in the Title picture- basically because Nikki has a fucked up Neck is infuriating to me. I wouldn't have even minded Paige getting another Title match as a "bridge" to whatever they have planned for Mania, but I just can't take Brie Bella seriously as a Title contender when last night was probably her first win in 2016. Can Bryan just put a Baby in Brie to save us all.

Big Show v Erick Rowan
With Bray (understandably) not at TV, this segment was pretty much as uninteresting and generally bad as it conceivably could. The only thing that could have made it worse is if the match had ended in a DQ. It was Big Show v Erick Rowan, I think that says it all really.

The after-match beatdown of Show was necessary I suppose, but it was about as good at holding my attention as the match was.

Titus O'Neil v Tyler Breeze
THIS WAS WAS THE SECOND HOUR FOLKS. BRIE BELLA BEATING CHARLOTTE, THE BIG SHOW V ERICK ROWAN AND TITUS O'NEIL V TYLER BREEZE. This match wasn't "bad", but at the same time- it wasn't exactly a Match of the Year contender.

Brock Lesnar & Triple H Backstage Promo
I actually liked this segment. Say what you want about Triple H, but he does know how to put himself across to fit different angles. This segment was pretty standard in content, but the way both Triple H and Brock delivered said content made it good.

Dolph Ziggler v Kevin Owens
As soon as Owens did his whole "I'm on a beating Ziggler streak" thing on Twitter, we all knew Dolph was winning tonight. With that said, and given the fact we have had 9 Owens/Ziggler matches now- it was an alright match. It's by no means the best Owens/Ziggler match, but at the same time any Owens/Ziggler match is going to reach a certain standard. I do think this match suffered from what had preceded it, as well as the generally awful crowd.

Sasha Banks v Becky Lynch
The reason it's a pretty safe bet that Brie's got a Title match at Fast Lane is because of this match and what it ended up being. The actual Sasha/Becky match didn't really get going, understandably so. I think we've got a guaranteed Pre-Show match with Sasha & Becky v Tamina & Naomi. The angle was actually pretty good, and I hope they can play up the Sasha/Becky history from NXT. This match as a "bridge" for Sasha and Becky into the Mania build is an easy way to put both over, I suppose. I can already see Sasha & Becky simultaneously making Naomi & Tamina tap in a few weeks time.

Chris Jericho Backstage Promo
The Jericho/AJ stuff is interesting, in that Jericho really is the perfect person to put AJ over on arrival. That combined with the fact Jericho will inevitably end up playing the Heel opposite AJ makes me quite optimistic for the feud, should they fully pull the trigger on it- as it seems they're on the brink of doing.

Goldust & R-Truth's wacky antics
I actually like the potential "Golden Truth" team. Both guys have really good comedic timing, and depending on how far, and how quickly they're pushed they could make really good opponents for The New Day. That'll be a feud and a half.

The Rock's Cousin & The Rock's Cousin's Friend v The New Day
I enjoyed the match, but can we please talk about The New Day's Promo. I've freely admitted New Day have gone slightly downhill as of late. However, these last two RAW's have put New Day right back up as the best thing going in the WWE- including AJ Styles. New Day's Promo was just absolutely amazing. Everything from the Amber Rose stuff with Kofi wagging his finger around to Kofi threatening to beat up an 8 Year Old to them bringing up fucked up Fanfiction. It was all just amazing. It appears as though The Rock bestowed upon them a mission to single-handedly end the PG era by force.

The match was pretty good as well. The only criticism I can have of it is, for the love of god can Big E stop taking stupid bumps! Big E is only 29, if he takes care of himself and carries on his current trajectory he can be a genuine Main Eventer for a number of years. That won't be possible if he fucking kills himself by doing the Middle Rope Spear and literally bouncing of the edge of the Ring Apron in a "missed Splash" spot.

I was a bit annoyed New Day lost clean, especially because they've usually handled them quite well in these situations such as when they faced Orton & Reigns and Orton & Ambrose. However, I do acknowledge in comparison to the Fast Lane Main Event they don't take priority.

The stuff with Brock after I loved- however poorly it was shot, in-terms of what it meant going forward. Reigns was fucking around with Kofi, and then Ambrose is left in the ring with Brock Lesnar- after taking most of the punishment in the match. I do genuinely believe this is all building to Ambrose turning on Roman after he beats Triple H at Mania. Ambrose must be getting sick of taking all of the beatings while Roman takes all of the glory at this point- especially if Ambrose loses the IC Title before said Mania Main Event.

Last Night's RAW was just so weird. On the one hand we had absolutely amazing moments, and then we had things like Erick Rowan vs The Big Show. I suppose on three hour RAW's you always have to take the good with the bad, and last night was just an extreme example of that.

Thanks to you lot for reading as always, as I said at the start I'm trying to get these back to a regular thing now. Especially heading into Mania season, I think you all need more right opinions in your life. Thanks again for reading, I hope you have a good week- and if I were you I'd chuck all of your moneys on Miz beating AJ on Smackdown. All of them.